Invitation Revoked

I don’t know about you, but she can kiss my Black ass. I’m talking about Omaroho Omarosa. This woman spent the last two years kissing up to her Orange Massa and talking down to Black folks like some privileged house nigra and now she expects all to be forgiven just because she shed some salty ass tears of fake redemption. President Comb Over got tired of her ass kissing, kicked her out of the Big House and now she expects us to take her back in like all is forgiven…it’s not. This is the woman who said her Tangerine Tinged Suga Daddy had a hit list and “we” were coming after everyone on it when he got in to office. Apparently, she never actually saw the list because she didn’t know her name was included.

So, she got fired from her job as Director of Communications for the Office of Public Liaison, which translated means she oversaw fetching Big Macs and Diet Cokes for the Great Orange Pumpkin. She found her way back to reality TV where she got her start and now she’s out here on some lame ass apology tour talking about how she regrets voting and campaigning for the Head Racist in Charge and says she was abused by his White House Klan staff.  This nasty narcissistic arrogant cretin chose to be Trump's token Black bitch girl ho (sorry I tried but couldn’t find an appropriate term that wasn’t demeaning, so I gave up) and was willing to play window dressing to his administration’s racist agenda because she thought it would bring her notoriety, money, and power. She sold her soul and her dignity to President Cheeto like she was booking a suite in Dante’s Inferno.

 My guess is she got tired of standing around and looking Black for the pleasure of President Carrot Spice because now she claims she’s had enough of him and as if it were some new revelation or long held dark secret says we should all be worried about his race-baiting and pandering to the bigotry of his supporters. Bitch Please! Where you been? Omarosa continues to be the dishonest backstabbing hustler she always was. Nothing’s changed. She’s an obnoxious repugnant attention seeking whore and when she found herself no longer in the spotlight she made a big fuss and got herself very publicly fired…and a book deal.

So, as I know you’ve all been wondering why it hasn’t been done by now, below I’ve compiled in no particular order, a list of ten reasons why Omarosa should be banned from the annual family cookout for life…and forced to eat never ending quantities of unseasoned chicken and bland runny potato salad peppered with conversations about hockey and Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s stock car triumphs at gatherings hosted by her previously adopted White brethren.

1. In her obsessive ego driven quest for fame she failed to recognize that allowing herself to be a token tool in the Blood Orange President’s pursuit of White Supremacy was an absolute fool’s errand.

2. She stupidly and incorrectly assumed the minions she crushed beneath her Red Bottoms in her pursuit of world domination would welcome her return with open arms.

3. Wait, didn’t she become a minister a while back? What happened to her pastoral duties when she decided to stump for the Marmalade Monkey. I have questions.

4. Because I never forgave her devious vile lying ass for throwing Kwame Jackson under the bus in season 1 of The Apprentice.

5. As previously stated above, Bitch Please.

6. Because everything she says and does is all planned and orchestrated and reeks of obvious desperation to remain relevant until her book is released.

7. Her desired route to financial security was to willingly and joyfully jump into bed with bigots.

8. Because her former fiancé actor Michael Clarke Duncan died of a heart attack and I still got questions.

9. Even though she claims she resigned, her ass got thrown out the front door of the White House like Uncle Phil tossing Jazz on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air

10. She’s obviously a Russian troll what other explanation is there for her support of an ignorant, chauvinistic, classless, multiple deferment, draft dodging …uh never mind see #7.

Misstated Union

No, I didn’t watch. I did everything within my power to avoid Jabba the Orange Hutt’s State of the Union speech. I’m fully aware of this man’s Millennial Southern Strategy and watching him spew his racist venom to his base in support of his ethnic cleansing plan is something I don’t need in my life. Not to mention the fact that I can’t afford a new TV…I surely would have thrown something at it. So instead I watched a pre-recorded episode of Black Lightning (the jury’s still out on this one) because I knew I would hear all about it the next day. So, no I didn’t watch it, but I knew he would not disappoint.

As predicted, the orange hued racist in charge made a bunch of promises which won’t be kept. He boasted about the state of the economy of which he has had no effect. He bragged about his numbers. He continued his divisive alienation rhetoric and reached out to the aforementioned base with statements like, “Americans are Dreamers too” which is the new All Lives Matter and he further promoted his demonization of immigrants as the boogie man intent on murdering innocent Americans. I find it interesting that he had the families of victims killed by what he characterized as illegal alien gang bangers but where were the families of those beaten or killed by the Alt Right White Supremacists. Charlottesville anyone? Yeah, interesting but not surprising.

So, what about those economic numbers he bragged about? Two things. First, he refuses to acknowledge the fact that he’s simply riding the wave of the economic surplus and decreasing unemployment trend which began under the previous administration (thanks, Obama). Seriously, this man claims Black unemployment is at its lowest since slavery, but I need someone to point out to me which of his administration’s policies has specifically addressed Black unemployment. Oh, my bad I forgot about his job stimulus plan to deport undocumented immigrants and replace their low wage jobs with African-Americans because as I’m sure you’re aware, we’re all part of the great uneducated Black monolith and these are the only ones for which we qualify…and you should be grateful for the Great Pumpkin’s gracious generosity. Second, the statistics he cites are the same ones which he previously dismissed as “falsified” when they were used for President Obama. This orange tinted clown denied the positive economic indicators under Obama but now suddenly, they’re ok and of course he takes credit for them. (releases heavy exasperated sigh)

Truthfully, the only thing this man is concerned with is convincing his dumb ass supporters that nothing is ever his fault. In their eyes he’s doing everything he can to get things done and if it wasn’t for the damn FBI, Democrats and the Secret Society of People Who Hate Fat Orange Men he would have completed all his campaign bullshit promises by now. Oh, and Hillary let’s not forget to blame Hillary. Whenever he considers himself under attack, he deflects to Hillary because after all she is to blame for all the ills of the world…right? Well at least all the ills of his world.

Anywho, hate to break up my rant but I gotta go. I just got a memo I need to read.

Oprah For President?

My top ten reasons why this Oprah for President nonsense must cease immediately. In no particular order.

1. Giving great speeches doesn't make you competent to govern. In no other field would we trust an amateur to learn on the job to take care of our needs.

2. Some of the same 53% of White women who voted for Trump are also part of Oprah’s suburban soccer mom fanbase. Who’s to say where the loyalty lies.

3. No more TV personalities for president. Hasn’t America learned its lesson? Just because you’re popular doesn’t mean you’ll make a great president. Oprah is a great philanthropist but she’s no match for experienced politicians or constitutional lawyers. Having a solid history of experience in government is mandatory for the position. Government is not a business and contrary to the sometimes-hilarious shenanigans of the current administration, it is not entertainment.

4. Because we’re better than Republicans who are incapable of learning from their mistakes. The Democrats need to quit bullshitting and relying on Trump to fail and start grooming and promoting a qualified candidate today.

5. Trump is literally the Village Idiot, so I know it’s easy to think, “well if he can become President, anyone can”, but no…just no.

6. Let’s not forget Oprah’s early TV work. Shows like Jerry Springer & Maury Povich are a direct result of her early sensationalized version of television journalism.

7. Instead of running for office wouldn’t America benefit greater if Oprah started a super PAC? Money from her and Tom Sever alone could create millions to help flip some state houses and congressional seats.

8. I don’t know about you but the fact that she force fed Doctors Phil & Oz to an unsuspecting and extremely gullible world really makes me question her judgment not to mention the moral implications of such a gift.

9. Trump won not just because of his celebrity but because he was willing to say out loud the things, so many closeted bigots thought or uttered privately among themselves.

10. I like Oprah, but unless she intends to give everyone in America a car, I don't see her as president.

OK, so maybe number 3 is like 4 reasons but I wanted a top 10 not a top 14…sue me.

My Left Foot

On a typical Thursday morning just a little over a month ago, I awoke to the buzz of my alarm clock. I lay there for a moment contemplating my day and my morning workout. Nothing special just an easy Thursday heading towards the weekend. I sat up in bed and turned to place my feet on the floor. As my feet hit the hardwood, I felt something shoot up my left foot. Now, I’ve never gotten the holy ghost or spoken in tongues but the sound that emanated from me came from deep within my gut and can only be described as tribal. I screamed a piercing high pitched melodious Phantom of the Opera, Three Tenors, Minnie Ripperton glass shattering note, and I cried. I cried hard.  I cried for the all the injustices in the world, I cried for the suffering children of Africa you know, the ones with the flies all over their faces, and I cried for myself…this was some unprecedented painful shit people. I felt like it went on for an hour but in reality, it was probably less than 30 seconds.

At some point I regained my composure and I don’t know what the hell I was thinking, or I guess I wasn’t because I put my foot down again. Now, I thought what I had experienced the first time was pain but folks, this was some other level shit. I didn’t know what to do to stop the ever-increasing painful agony. So, I just lifted my foot in the air and it worked, momentarily. But as soon as the pain realized where I had placed my foot it reacted like “so that’s where you went” and immediately shot the red-hot fire right back into it. So now I’m sitting with my foot in the air and screaming in excruciating pain because I have no idea what the hell is going on. So, I lowered my foot slowly, but didn’t let it hit the floor…now what?

I got up and hopped on one foot to turn the light on. I looked down (mistake) and this time I covered my mouth because what I saw made me want to scream not in pain but in terror. At the bottom of my ankle was this big red swollen mass of flesh with toes peeking out. Seriously, it looked like a scene from some comical horror film. My foot was the size of a small round black bomb like from a Looney Tunes cartoon and it was throbbing like it was about to explode. I looked like the spawn of big foot. It was so puffed up I’m surprised it didn’t just float away. It was so big that…ok, I’m all out of metaphors but you get the point, sucka was big.

So, what you may ask, was wrong with my enormous pontoon? Gout. Yep, I’ve officially become an old man with gout. All I need now is a walker, orthopedic slippers and some adult diapers. Now to be clear I diagnosed myself before ever heading to the doctor. I googled…which was a mistake. Although my self-diagnosis was correct I also found a lot of misinformation. A lot! One website insisted I should immediately stop eating all types of meat, fish and most fruit & vegetables. WTF. What was I expected to eat, humans? But the one that struck me like a bolt of lightning was when I googled again, and it said no more alcohol…ever. None. Nada. Zippo. To be clear this website said that I was to spend the remainder of my life in a constant state of sobriety which is bad enough in a normal world but in this current Trump era? Blasphemy! Shoot me! Seriously, just kill me now. Most people who know me know that I’ve been known to occasionally indulge in the spirits. You know every now and then… (ominous music plays in the background)…ok, I’m a drunk. But at least I admit it and the thought of going through life without the use of alcohol as a crutch to help me get through the good and bad was just unnerving.

Fortunately, I’m blessed with a great medical plan which allowed me to immediately hobble in my flip flops for a chat with my personal White Coat. He explained to me that yes most of the things I read were true but the foods I read about could be eaten in moderation. Nobody was asking me to become a cannibal. So, I asked him in what I thought was a calm voice but in reality, was me speaking through tears brought on by the thought of the aforementioned sobriety, “what about liquor?”. He paused, I think intentionally. It was like a cliff hanger from a soap opera. I sat there waiting for his answer as the music pumped slowly to a crescendo and the camera alternated between close ups of my face and his. Finally, he said, “yes…in moderation”. When I came to (because surely, I had passed out from sheer joy) I found myself thanking him profusely. I was shaking his hand and damn near doing back flips…uh, maybe I should consider sobriety.

Anyway, the foot swelling and pain lasted a good two weeks and since then I’ve been eating just chicken, select vegetables, fruit and a lot of milk and dairy. Lactose intolerance be damned (lets loose silent fart). No red meat, pork or shellfish. And the liquor? Frankly I’m scared to death. The idea of my foot swelling to the size of an elephant’s hoof again is terrifying. I’ve had a total of three shots over a three-week period…yes, I counted and measured. Maybe I should share my story at an AA meeting. Could prove to be a great cautionary tale.

Stuntman

So yesterday Trump’s little bitch pulled the most obvious publicity stunt of the year. Can someone explain to me why the Orange President’s VP took a flight from Las Vegas to Indianapolis to watch a game with a decidedly predictable outcome (sorry fellow 49ers fans) especially knowing he had to be in Los Angeles the next day. This was not only a publicity stunt but a costly one for American tax payers. Although they have intensified with the current season, the kneeling protest have been going on for well over a year, so there is absolutely no way this drama queen did not know this would happen. Are we to believe he was caught off guard? Blatant, obvious, desperate, stunt. He even left the traveling media pool in the car with the engine running and probably told them “I’ll be right back”. Nothing more than a shameful tactic to appeal to Trump’s flag waving racist base. Also, although it has absolutely nothing to do with the NFL protest I just love pointing out the fact that this man calls his wife mother. Creepy.

I’m getting a little tired of the arrogance and entitlement of the anti-protester crowd. You know the ones. They say these athletes should be happy to be earning their salaries and they should just shut up and be thankful. But thankful to whom? As if they are the ones who gave them permission to earn money. Condescending bullshit. Athletes protesting systemic murder of minorities should not be a political issue it should be something everyone is on board with.

What’s been conveniently left out of this conversation about so-called disrespect of the flag is that it was a former Green Beret Nate Boyer, also an NFL player, who convinced Kaepernick to kneel during the anthem rather than sit, which was his original form of protest. He and Kaepernick agreed this would be a more respectful form of protest. They chose kneeling versus sitting precisely because it’s not disrespectful.

In other news this weekend, as Trump and his minions distract with their usual bullshit divisive rhetoric, seemingly paranoid white supremacist Nazis returned to Charlottesville with their tiki torches shouting, “You will not replace us!” I assume they were referring to sane and reasonable non-racist people replacing them. They also included, “The south will rise again” and my favorite, “Russia is our friend”. So, suggesting civil war by claiming the south will rise again, which is in fact a threat of treason is now somehow acceptable and patriotic but kneeling in peaceful protest is disrespectful to the flag. Also, last time I checked Russia was still considered a hostile foreign government. Just want to be clear.

Lost Messages

Ok so I just want to clarify what I wrote the other day. The current cover of Sports Illustrated is tilted A Nation Divided, Sports United. It’s meant to be a comment on the ongoing protest and is comprised of athletes from various sports teams and although Colin Kaepernick is nowhere to be found there are several prominent White men included. The deliberate exclusion makes it painfully obvious that the protest begun by Colin Kaepernick over a year ago has been completely lost. His protest was not about first amendment rights and certainly not the NFL’s ego. Kaepernick knelt to protest government sanctioned murder of people of color. I blamed Trump for changing the narrative but the NFL is complicit as well. The NFL has co-opted his protest and are attempting to create some bullshit revisionism and it’s happening right before our eyes. By making this a free speech issue or a protest over divisive statements made by Trump or his blatantly racist supporters assertion that those kneeling are disrespecting the military and veterans, attention has successfully been diverted away from the actual message. This is what Kaepernick had to say at the beginning of his decision to kneel.

"I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color. To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder."

When Kaepernick started this movement, Trump was nowhere to be found. Well he wasn’t President yet at any rate. The point he made regarding systemic racism, police brutality and centuries-long oppression has been hijacked by those who have instead made it in to some watered down anti-Trump liberal cause. These new protests may in fact contain some who are well intentioned but what they’ve done is made it more easily consumable by White audiences and I’m pretty sure the NFL is aware of this fact. They’ve effectively and purposely white-washed Kaepernick’s cause to where it’s no longer recognizable. By the time the Super Bowl comes up everyone will be kneeling on one knee and singing Kumbaya to protest non-ecofriendly yoga mats or some shit.

One more thing and I’m done. When I saw Ray Lewis kneeling I lost it. This shucking and jiving murdering motherfucker is the same one who said Kaepernick should cut his hair in order to be accepted and taken seriously. He called him un-American and he's the same dumbass who told Baltimore owners not to hire Kaepernick based on something his girlfriend said. To add insult to injury when a petition was started to remove Lewis’ statue in Baltimore his bitch ass damn near broke down in tears and said he wasn't kneeling on one knee in protest he was praying on two. Right. Fuck you Ray Lewis you ignorant sell out Stepin Fetchit asshole.

I'm done, I have no more words.

Offended

Is booing during the national anthem now somehow respectful? On Sunday and again on Monday night players from several NFL teams peacefully protested amidst boos from their home crowds. Some chose not to take the field at all during the playing of the anthem while others kneeled and looked directly at the flag. So, I must ask the question, who was more disrespectful, those who kneeled in silent protest or those who disrupted the national anthem which could not be heard over their incessant rude booing? I’d also really like to know exactly what the privileged consider an acceptable form of protest. We’re told don’t march in protest, don’t kneel in protest, don’t use social media to protest and don’t dare challenge the Orange President in protest. Apparently for some the only acceptable form of protest is polite and quiet submission.

With his constant blabbering, divisive tweets, calling black men’s mothers bitches and insisting peaceful protesters should be fired the orange man has successfully managed to distract from the original issue of Kaepernick’s protest of systemic racism and engaged his audience in a fake patriotic stupid flag waving narrative. He has made this an issue of disrespecting our military and questioning the protesters patriotism while purposely refusing to address the real issue. How about the fact that our communities continue to face terrible and cruel injustices? According to him and his ilk we should be thankful. Thankful to be second class citizens. How dare these ungrateful players express concern for themselves and interrupt White people’s weekend entertainment of gleefully watching mostly Black men bloody themselves running into each other with their stupid whiny protest. Because of course they see us as entertainment…only.

The American flag is meant to represent freedom and justice for all…at least that’s what we’ve been taught. The irony in all of this is that those who object to peaceful protest are the ones who are un-American. They choose to ignore the statement against social injustice and racial inequality made by protesters. They choose to be offended by protesters who say this is not about the American flag or the military. They refuse to acknowledge the fact that these players actually take pride in their country and risk their jobs and sponsorship's with these protests. They refuse to acknowledge systemic racism but continue to be its main beneficiaries. They refuse to grasp the concept of the right to protest which is as American as you can get. It is my right as an American to honor or ignore the flag or the national anthem and thankfully my right to ignore forced patriotism. I continue to be amazed at how angry racists get and all caught up in their feelings whenever Black people exercise their constitutional rights in this country.

Stupid

Why won’t this man stop being stupid? Seriously, nobody says this much stupid shit without a gun to the head or at least a family member or their pet dog being held hostage or some shit. I’m beginning to think he’s really a robot programmed by aliens from outer space to continually say stupid things in an attempt to divert our attention away from an imminent alien attack. We’re all going to wake up one morning on space ships headed for a strange planet to be food for cannibal aliens who all look like Trump (shudders).

Ok, so I’ll try and make this short…no promises. The “many sides” statement from the orange President in response to the Bring Back Slavery rally last week in Virginia is absolute bullshit. There were not many sides there were two. Evil vs. Good. Period. On one side were people who wanted to “make America great again” by taking us back to a day when certain people “knew their place” and were subservient to them. On one side were people with torches, guns and carrying symbols of hate while shouting racial, religious, and anti-LGBT slogans. On one side were Neo-Nazi’s and the KKK terrorists proudly touting their belief that minorities are less than human and should be treated accordingly. On one side were White Supremacists masquerading as members of the local historical society demanding that we respect shit like monuments to slavers who literally went to war to continue owning people. And on the other side were protest groups, opposed to all of it. But Donald Trump sees many sides. For him there is no difference between those who want to pay tribute to and honor people who attempted to overthrow the government of the United States with force and violence and those who fought against it. He sees no distinction between groups like the NAACP and the Black Lives Matter movement and those nice people with a history of hate filled oppression and violent intimidation often leading to the lynching of Black folks…and he’s proud of it.

In a typical case of false equivalency often cited by his fellow racists Trump points out the fact that Presidents Washington and Jefferson owned slaves. Of course, this is not news to anyone who has studied American history and no one I know of has ever given them a pass just because they were presidents. In fact, Jefferson was a study in contradiction as he proposed federal legislation banning slavery in the New Territories and denouncing the international slave trade while continuing to own and refusing to free his slaves. So, no passes given.  But Trump for some reason sees absolutely no difference between monuments of intimidation erected in honor of those who waged a failed treasonous effort to hold and barter human beings like cattle and those that honor the founders of our republic.

One more thing. When black people protest, the cops pull out tanks, cannons, gas, rubber bullets, bean bag shotguns, helicopters, dogs, and everything short of the Death Star Super Laser and the Imperial Star Fleet (Ok, I’m a Geek at heart, what can I say). These racist assholes showed up with body armor, rifles, clubs and brass knuckles and for some reason the police decided then would be the perfect time to hang back and maybe grab a cup of coffee. If these had been Black protesters who showed up like that, they would have had the National Guard out literally busting heads and killing folks.

The day after the election I wrote and called out the bullshit of those claiming the campaign and election of Trump was about jobs and the economy. At this point it should be pretty clear what his election and presidency are all about. On Wednesday, the day after he doubled down on his many sides statement he received congratulatory messages from David Duke of the KKK, White Nationalist, leaders of the Alt Right movement and countless openly racist right-wing radio and television personalities. These are his supporters. Racists. Xenophobes. Bigots. In his campaign, he openly and shamelessly pandered to them. This man has spent decades fueling hate, bigotry and bias so if you voted for Donald Trump and believe yourself not a racist, then your ass is at the very least a racist enabler. Oh, and one more time. If you did vote for him or didn’t vote at all because you thought “Hilary was just as bad as Trump” again, fuck you.

Anybody Seen Baretta?

So O.J. has been granted parole and I find myself unable to give a fuck. Not one. Zero, nada, none, nohl. Legally there wasn’t much of a challenge. Dumbass did his time and apparently was a model prisoner so no surprise, they let him go. Now maybe he’ll go somewhere and sit his ashy ass down. Seriously dude got away with murder double murder and then goes to jail for jacking his own shit and gets sentenced to 33 years. Did I mention it was his own shit? He deserved jail just for the sheer stupidity and for apparently forgetting he had already used his one Get Out Of Jail Free card.

Here’s the thing. O.J.’s murder trial was never about his guilt or innocence. The trial was about the guilt of America’s racist criminal justice system and I get it. I get why Black people would stand behind and support such a cause. The Dream Team was able to shift the focus in the minds of Black people from the actual crime to one of historical racial injustice thereby creating a winning strategy. Which was brilliant strategizing and for that they should be applauded. Unfortunately, the verdict did nothing for a still corrupt and racist criminal justice system…nothing. He was acquitted and ultimately the only thing it proved was that money can buy anything. Including innocence. He was never the humble innocent man victimized by a racist system which was the ticket his team sold to Black America. To be honest, there were and still are many more deserving of a Dream Team. Post acquittal he was the same arrogant, egotistical asshole he had been before. He could’ve spent his remaining days playing golf and chilling in Florida and I don’t know maybe shown some actual humility by doing something to express appreciation to a community who had rallied and stood behind him.

But he couldn’t shut up or be bothered with Black people because as he said himself, "I'm not Black, I'm O.J."  He could not stand being out of the spotlight, so every time you looked around there he was. Hanging out with various blonde White women and writing stupid books like, If I Did It. This book was essentially a confessional which detailed how he would have committed the murders...if he had done it. Because. He. Did. It. Yep, I said it and I’ve said it for years. I said it before the trial, during the trial and after the trial and I was villainized for it. But the fact is there weren’t any secret Ninjas in the dead of night folks, the LAPD did not frame him, it wasn’t his damn son or the Illuminati nor any of the other seriously ridiculous theories floated over the years. The murders were committed by Orenthal James Simpson. So just stop it. His ass is guilty…and you know it.

At any rate, writing dumb books and talking about how he was looking for the real killer while relaxing on the golf course and partying with the aforementioned blondes was like rubbing salt in the wound and it just antagonized and pissed off White people more and more. So they kept messing with him. The FBI searched his home for drugs and accused him of money laundering. DirecTV sued him for pirating broadcast signals. Really, they did and they won. Then he was arrested for speeding…on a boat. Seriously, who gets arrested for speeding on the water? If it was a speed trap where would they even hide? Dumb ass. That alone should have been his cue that they were looking for a reason any reason to lock his Black ass up. But nope he’s sitting around one night chilling and drinking with his homies and one of them says “you know what Juice, we oughta go get your shit” and…well you know the rest.

So here’s a question. When was the last time anyone heard from Robert Blake? Seriously, where the hell is Baretta. He too was questionably acquitted for the murder of his wife but you know what he did. Got the hell out of town. Fell completely off the radar and we haven’t heard from or seen him since. Unfortunately, this will not be the case for Mr. Simpson. In his mind he’s still the Juice from the 70’s flying through airports, renting cars from Avis and everyone knows and loves him. Mark my words, his attention seeking ass will return and with a blonde on each arm. They’re lined up at the prison gates right now waiting for him. 

The Russian Connection

I’m really beginning to feel like we’ve all been somehow cast in the television show, Everybody Hates Trump. (Seriously, the entire world hates this man. Check out this link, Trump Ain't Shit). Surely, this can’t be real life. I keep waiting for someone to wake me up from this sitcom nightmare and to be honest, I’m not sure if it’s a sitcom or a drama. Maybe a dramedy because it’s funny and you have to laugh at the stupidity but at the same time the stupidity is really just sad. At any rate, in case you missed this week’s show, grab yourself a bucket of popcorn and allow me to recap.

Another shoe has dropped in what has already been a pretty rainy shoe season for Trump and this whole Russia mess. According to the New York Times, over a year ago Sonny Corleone Donald Trump, Jr. met with a Russian operative who promised damaging information to be used by the Trump campaign against candidate Hillary Clinton. When the article came out last Saturday Junior immediately denied the meeting ever took place. He then retracted and said it took place but it was about Russian adoptions. So the New York Times said hold on buddy we’ve got your email exchange discussing the meeting. So before they could release them, Junior releases screenshots of the text messages because you know, he wanted to be all transparent and shit. My first thought was damn what an idiot, but then I realized he was simply trying to get in front of the New York Times who were about to release them anyway and he figured if he released them first it would look as though he had nothing to hide. Naturally Trump’s base of dolts totally bought into this bullshit and were immediately affected with Whataboutitis. What about Hillary, what about Obama, Benghazi, Obamacare, bring back coal! What a bunch of idiots. 

Actually releasing the emails would have been a nice plan except just like the New York Times article implied, the emails are full of evidence of Russian collusion. Junior says there’s no collusion because the meeting ended with no exchange of any useful information. Whatever the hell that means. Now I know some may agree with Junior’s assessment but if I broke into your house but didn’t take anything because I realized our taste in merchandise differed and opted to leave all of your gaudy furnishings behind, it would make me no less guilty. I still broke into you home…intent. And we only have Junior’s word on that whole no useful information thing. So where’s the collusion?  In the emails. The Russians stated the damaging information regarding Hillary Clinton was part of Russia’s support for candidate Trump. This is exactly what the contact said in the email to Dumbass. The Crown prosecutor of Russia met with his father Aras this morning and in their meeting offered to provide the Trump campaign with some official documents and information that would incriminate Hillary and her dealings with Russia and would be very useful to your father. This is obviously very high level and sensitive information but is part of Russia and its government's support for Mr. Trump. Seems pretty clear to me, stolen documents offered as “part of Russia and its government's support for Mr. Trump”. Junior responded with “If it’s what you say I love it.”

Last year after news broke that the DNC had been hacked and they suspected the Russians were behind it and attempting to help Trump, Junior had this to say "Well, it just goes to show you their exact moral compass. I mean they'll say anything to be able to win this. I mean, this is time and time again, lie after lie after lie." Wow. This privileged arrogant asshole has the nerve to question someone’s moral compass yet he was so desperate to get dirt on Hillary Clinton that he met with a representative of a hostile foreign government who was offering support for his father, Donald Trump by releasing stolen evidence against Hillary Clinton, his political opponent. He then had the audacity to spend the entire year claiming the media and fake news were attempting to frame his father for a nonexistent crime. He is certainly guilty of treason and at a minimum of election tampering. And he must have balls the size of an elephant.

Of course Trump Sr. says he had no knowledge of Junior’s meeting with the Russians until the New York Times story broke but check out what he had to say last year two days before the meeting took place, "I am going to give a major speech on probably Monday of next week and we're going to be discussing all of the things that have taken place with the Clintons,", "I think you're going to find it very informative and very, very interesting." I’m sure the timeline is purely coincidental. It must be noted as well that both Paul Manafort who was Trump’s campaign manager at the time and Jared Kushner Trump’s son in law also attended the meeting. A meeting Kushner failed to disclose as part of his security clearance. Twice. Wait, what now? New information in says Trump’s lawyers knew about the meeting at least three weeks ago. But yeah, control freak Trump knew nothing about it. Oh, and yesterday he blamed the entire scandal on the Obama administration...of course.

To be clear this is the stupidest administration in the history of our country but we are dealing with a group of people who have never been held accountable for their actions in their lives. The privilege and smugness and their superior attitude of being untouchable is sickening. Unfortunately, they are correct. In the end, in spite of the fact that all of this should aid in making Mueller’s job easier, nothing will happen. As usual there will be no consequences. Everyone will be righteously indignant for a few days and then the show will continue. Tune in next week to see what happens after Junior learns daddy has thrown his ass under the bus…and Fredo Eric is driving.