Invitation Revoked

I don’t know about you, but she can kiss my Black ass. I’m talking about Omaroho Omarosa. This woman spent the last two years kissing up to her Orange Massa and talking down to Black folks like some privileged house nigra and now she expects all to be forgiven just because she shed some salty ass tears of fake redemption. President Comb Over got tired of her ass kissing, kicked her out of the Big House and now she expects us to take her back in like all is forgiven…it’s not. This is the woman who said her Tangerine Tinged Suga Daddy had a hit list and “we” were coming after everyone on it when he got in to office. Apparently, she never actually saw the list because she didn’t know her name was included.

So, she got fired from her job as Director of Communications for the Office of Public Liaison, which translated means she oversaw fetching Big Macs and Diet Cokes for the Great Orange Pumpkin. She found her way back to reality TV where she got her start and now she’s out here on some lame ass apology tour talking about how she regrets voting and campaigning for the Head Racist in Charge and says she was abused by his White House Klan staff.  This nasty narcissistic arrogant cretin chose to be Trump's token Black bitch girl ho (sorry I tried but couldn’t find an appropriate term that wasn’t demeaning, so I gave up) and was willing to play window dressing to his administration’s racist agenda because she thought it would bring her notoriety, money, and power. She sold her soul and her dignity to President Cheeto like she was booking a suite in Dante’s Inferno.

 My guess is she got tired of standing around and looking Black for the pleasure of President Carrot Spice because now she claims she’s had enough of him and as if it were some new revelation or long held dark secret says we should all be worried about his race-baiting and pandering to the bigotry of his supporters. Bitch Please! Where you been? Omarosa continues to be the dishonest backstabbing hustler she always was. Nothing’s changed. She’s an obnoxious repugnant attention seeking whore and when she found herself no longer in the spotlight she made a big fuss and got herself very publicly fired…and a book deal.

So, as I know you’ve all been wondering why it hasn’t been done by now, below I’ve compiled in no particular order, a list of ten reasons why Omarosa should be banned from the annual family cookout for life…and forced to eat never ending quantities of unseasoned chicken and bland runny potato salad peppered with conversations about hockey and Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s stock car triumphs at gatherings hosted by her previously adopted White brethren.

1. In her obsessive ego driven quest for fame she failed to recognize that allowing herself to be a token tool in the Blood Orange President’s pursuit of White Supremacy was an absolute fool’s errand.

2. She stupidly and incorrectly assumed the minions she crushed beneath her Red Bottoms in her pursuit of world domination would welcome her return with open arms.

3. Wait, didn’t she become a minister a while back? What happened to her pastoral duties when she decided to stump for the Marmalade Monkey. I have questions.

4. Because I never forgave her devious vile lying ass for throwing Kwame Jackson under the bus in season 1 of The Apprentice.

5. As previously stated above, Bitch Please.

6. Because everything she says and does is all planned and orchestrated and reeks of obvious desperation to remain relevant until her book is released.

7. Her desired route to financial security was to willingly and joyfully jump into bed with bigots.

8. Because her former fiancé actor Michael Clarke Duncan died of a heart attack and I still got questions.

9. Even though she claims she resigned, her ass got thrown out the front door of the White House like Uncle Phil tossing Jazz on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air

10. She’s obviously a Russian troll what other explanation is there for her support of an ignorant, chauvinistic, classless, multiple deferment, draft dodging …uh never mind see #7.

Misstated Union

No, I didn’t watch. I did everything within my power to avoid Jabba the Orange Hutt’s State of the Union speech. I’m fully aware of this man’s Millennial Southern Strategy and watching him spew his racist venom to his base in support of his ethnic cleansing plan is something I don’t need in my life. Not to mention the fact that I can’t afford a new TV…I surely would have thrown something at it. So instead I watched a pre-recorded episode of Black Lightning (the jury’s still out on this one) because I knew I would hear all about it the next day. So, no I didn’t watch it, but I knew he would not disappoint.

As predicted, the orange hued racist in charge made a bunch of promises which won’t be kept. He boasted about the state of the economy of which he has had no effect. He bragged about his numbers. He continued his divisive alienation rhetoric and reached out to the aforementioned base with statements like, “Americans are Dreamers too” which is the new All Lives Matter and he further promoted his demonization of immigrants as the boogie man intent on murdering innocent Americans. I find it interesting that he had the families of victims killed by what he characterized as illegal alien gang bangers but where were the families of those beaten or killed by the Alt Right White Supremacists. Charlottesville anyone? Yeah, interesting but not surprising.

So, what about those economic numbers he bragged about? Two things. First, he refuses to acknowledge the fact that he’s simply riding the wave of the economic surplus and decreasing unemployment trend which began under the previous administration (thanks, Obama). Seriously, this man claims Black unemployment is at its lowest since slavery, but I need someone to point out to me which of his administration’s policies has specifically addressed Black unemployment. Oh, my bad I forgot about his job stimulus plan to deport undocumented immigrants and replace their low wage jobs with African-Americans because as I’m sure you’re aware, we’re all part of the great uneducated Black monolith and these are the only ones for which we qualify…and you should be grateful for the Great Pumpkin’s gracious generosity. Second, the statistics he cites are the same ones which he previously dismissed as “falsified” when they were used for President Obama. This orange tinted clown denied the positive economic indicators under Obama but now suddenly, they’re ok and of course he takes credit for them. (releases heavy exasperated sigh)

Truthfully, the only thing this man is concerned with is convincing his dumb ass supporters that nothing is ever his fault. In their eyes he’s doing everything he can to get things done and if it wasn’t for the damn FBI, Democrats and the Secret Society of People Who Hate Fat Orange Men he would have completed all his campaign bullshit promises by now. Oh, and Hillary let’s not forget to blame Hillary. Whenever he considers himself under attack, he deflects to Hillary because after all she is to blame for all the ills of the world…right? Well at least all the ills of his world.

Anywho, hate to break up my rant but I gotta go. I just got a memo I need to read.