Slow News Day (Beyoncégate)

Well the question has been answered and America can breathe a sigh of relief. As the war persists in Afghanistan, civil unrest and religious conflict continue to plague the Middle East and the U.S. economy remains in need of resuscitation, yes folks the question has been answered, it’s true. Beyoncé pulled a Milli Vanilli while singing the national anthem at the presidential inauguration last week and the nation’s outraged. So has the press done anything to find out who is behind this travesty of a performance? Did President Obama know about this fraudulent presentation beforehand and is he a participant in the cover-up, or was he lied to as well. Was the White House sound technician part of the conspiracy? Did Beyoncé impose conditions on the United States Marine Band that backed her up? America demands the truth! Seriously, who gives a flying f*ck and why has so much press been devoted to this? With all the media fallout you would think she had been caught secretly shopping for outfits at Wal-Mart or something (although some of those House of Deréon so called fashions designed by her mother…just saying).

To be honest, those who watched expected and got a Beyoncé performance, which was all that was promised. It’s not like she did a lip synched performance to someone else’s vocals and tried to pass them off as her own (coughs Paula Abdul’s name). So why the outrage? New York Senator Chuck Schumer who organized and hosted the event says he is still waiting for an apology from Beyoncé, to which I have to ask, really senator? An apology? All references to hell freezing over aside I think the senator may be waiting a while, mainly because I don’t think she owes an apology to anyone. Her highness the Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin weighed (no pun intended) in saying "I thought it was really funny, but she did a beautiful job with the pre-record.” Ouch…talk about a back-handed compliment. She added that it never occurred to her to sing to a pre-recorded track when she performed at the 2008 inauguration ceremonies even though it was so cold her false teeth were chattering…and they were still in the glass. She added, "I wanted to give people the real thing and pre-recording never crossed my mind." Thanks for the shady support Ms. Franklin. To be honest I was so distracted by that damn hat I don’t know if Aretha was singing or not, I wasn’t listening. Hell she could have been reciting the Gettysburg Address for all I know. Jennifer Lopez never one to miss an opportunity to bask in the glow of others offered her support as well to which Beyoncé probably thought, “thanks but no thanks” because really when it comes to a question of singing, is this the person you want defending you.

The bottom line is it was her voice, not someone else's and despite what Hateretha and all the armchair critics had to say, it is quite understandable why someone may want to preserve their voice and not sing live in the cold windy weather. And ultimately, who cares. But let’s all forget President Obama’s stirring inaugural speech. Let’s ignore the significance of the fact that we had an African-American President inaugurated on the Martin Luther King, Jr. national holiday. Let’s instead focus on that which doesn’t matter. Let’s allow ourselves to be distracted from the coup going on in Virginia as redistricting threatens to eliminate a Democratic state senate seat or as Republicans attempt to break the system so that the will of the American electorate no longer matters. After all what’s more important.