I
haven't written for a while and I thought I was suffering from writer’s block,
but I now realize its grief. Next month I'll celebrate my 63rd birthday
and although I appreciate the wisdom and experience gained with age, I've come
to learn that maturity comes at a price. Over the past two years I have
suffered the loss of relatives and friends at an unforgiving rate. For each loss
the grief was different, and it’s caused me to be in an almost constant state
of mourning. It's also forced me to face my own mortality and own the fact
that, not all of those we love will continue the journey with us. Ultimately,
we are all born to die but I’ve grown to recognize death as simply a different
journey of which we will all embark at some point.
I
understand this realization may sound simplistic and for some harsh as we all
grieve differently. And it will do nothing to console those still suffering losses,
but for me it was somewhat cathartic. So, I’ve decided to use it to fuel my own
journey’s continuation. I’ve become more appreciative of my friends and family
and for some it may sound dark, but I’ve embraced the notion that each moment spent
could be the last. I’ve never been one to travel in the world of “what if
"or "if I had only" when it comes to life and events
from the past as I strongly believe everything happens for a reason and
although you can't rewrite your life story, you can certainly learn from it. The
people placed in our lives are not there by chance and we should not be selfish
but instead welcome the gift of their presence for as long as time allows. I
also believe that every encounter and person we meet serves a purpose in our
individual growth. Recognition of this fact ultimately adds to progression of
the journey.
At
any rate, I never claimed to be a philosopher I just had some rambling thoughts
I wanted to share as part of my personal grieving process.
