Friday, January 25, 2019

Expressive


There’s an expression often used by Black folks to describe a person with whom you may have become frustrated or annoyed. Although the expression is commonly used, it is reserved for an exclusive yet deserving person. This individual has allowed you to reach a point where you feel no other descriptive options are available so you may turn to the person next to you point and say in an exasperated unbelieving tone, "this muthafucka here". In an effort to more clearly articulate the usage of this expression, I thought I’d provide a few examples from current headlines.

  • Yesterday President Dumb Ass’ Commerce Secretary, Wilbur Ross was asked about his thoughts on furloughed government workers and their struggles making ends meet without pay checks because of the shutdown. When told that some federal workers were getting food from homeless shelters, he seemed perplexed and stated with absolute tone-deaf arrogance, "Well I know they are, and I don't really quite understand why." He noted they would be paid eventually and from atop his grand high horse said, "There's no real reason why they shouldn't be able to get a loan against it.” So, just to be clear, the solution from a man said to be worth over 700 million dollars is for cash strapped government workers to take out a bank loan in lieu of pay checks. Assuming they are credit worthy, they would take out a bank loan for money they are due from the government. When they are paid by said government, they would then pay back the loan with interest incurred for however long it took to get paid ... and he stated it as thought it was a matter of fact and simple solution anyone could figure out…this muthafucka here.
  •  When asked about Mr. Ross’ statement, the Tangelo President said that banks were also “working along” with those facing financial hardship during the shutdown, “and that’s what happens in a time like this.” Um ok, at this point I’m just gonna quote this asshole verbatim, “If you have mortgages, the mortgagees, the folks collecting the interest and all of those things, they work along,” “Local people know who they are, when they go for groceries and everything else,” “And I think what Wilbur was probably trying to say is that they will work along.” (releases heavy sigh) This muthafucka here. Banks are in the business of making money and don’t care about why you’re late on your mortgage….pay me or get out. And how out of touch with the common man do you have to be to think that the clerk at your local Ralph’s or Albertsons will say to you when you’re in line to pay your groceries, “Oh don’t worry about it just pay me whenever you get paid by the government. Here, have an extra steak or two”. #TeamToneDeaf
  • This morning Trump advisor and best bud for life, Roger Stone was arrested in relation to the ongoing Mueller probe. He faces multiple charges including working with WikiLeaks to hinder the Hillary Clinton 2016 presidential campaign, lying to Congress, witness tampering and obstructing the investigation into the Russian interference of the 2016 election. White House Press Secretary Sarah Suckabee Sanders this morning stated, “What I can tell you is that the specific charges that have been brought against Mr. Stone don’t have anything to do with the president” Ok so, Trump’s campaign manager Paul Manafort, Trump’s lawyer Michael Cohen, Trump’s National Security Advisor Michael Flynn and Trump’s longtime associate and aforementioned best bud Roger Stone have all been indicted and none of it has anything to do with Trump…Bitch please! This muthafucka here.
  • Finally, although the expression is used largely as a vehicle of frustration there are times when it’s used endearingly. Earlier this week the President who wears his ties freakishly too long proposed a deal to end the shutdown. He offered to give back DACA status to qualifying immigrants, with a 3-year term limit, in exchange for his stupid wall. Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi responded by basically telling him to kick rocks and in addition, uninvited his dumb ass to Congress for his annual State of the Union address. This morning President Flyaway Hair conceded to Nancy and offered a temporary end to the shutdown, with no concessions…This muthafucka here.